I bumped into this guy the other day. He offered me a fish sandwich ( a very generous serving size - I'd actually say he over catered) and talked of olive oil, persian dates and sandals. He was very intuitive, he knew all about the time I warmed my brother's toasted sandwich up by placing it under the hairy folds each side of my testes. He said that this, along with other 'harmful personal activities', had to end.
I went to a fancy dress party on the weekend. For some reason I felt a little worried about dressing up as Jaysus H. Christ. I was worried that some zealot would come up to me and berate me for my sacrilegious portrayal of everyone's favourite good time dude. It was the peak of World Youth Day- I'd seen some pilgrims (well not really pilgrims i guess) in Freo getting World Youth Day Crazy. They were singing in some other language 'hallelujah' (god knows what that means) and banging this big brass looking cross up and down. A dude in a khaki turtle neck walked passed with his friend and said "hare krishnas". He must of been some kind of theological scholar. (ha- i probably didn't spell hare krishna the wright weigh)
Anyway the party was pretty good. The only problem was as soon as I got there a guy dressed as the pope called my over and said "come here my son!". Technically I don't think Jesus is the Po Po's son so I said "no, you're my son" but then I remembered that the J-man never really procreated or even got close to the act- he was as virginal as a Young Liberal at university. Anyway, the Pope then said "I suppose you've got twelve mates coming' and I said "Yes, that's me, I'm Jesus". Then he wanted to riff, he wanted to fire Jesusy/Bible referenced jokes around. All I had was "tell me if you see some Romans".
And then when the conversation ended, as it was basically him talking, I said "I'm going to find a place to HANG out!!!" and walked off. But when I think about it - he was really nailed to a large cross, there's not really much hanging. Later, I said to Borat that I was "looking to get nailed tonight" and he laughed quite loudly. Guys that dress as Borat aren't usually that smart.
Before my class today, this guy from Singapore said "This is really good, sitting here on this seat and watching pretty girls walk passed" and then he showed me some stitches on his leg where he fell off a fence onto a chair "like Batman".
