Today has been the most boring day of my whole entire life. I started thinking and have come to the conclusion that I may have peaked in primary school. That's when I was at the top of my powers. Glory days.
I passed a bus full of old people that had "You've got a lot of living to do" across the side which is basically code for "You've got a lot of living left to do" which is basically code for "You haven't got a lot of living left to do".
I read the Bunbury paper today. The letters were exceptional. I think they were written by toads who have somehow gotten a lift up to a keyboard from an old Lions club retiree. One of the letters bemoaned the sale of Bunbury's prime beachside real estate to 'Chinese interests"! Oh no. The world is done for. Might as well drink that communal Kool-Aid and wait for the mothership. Prime real estate has been purchased by foreigners!!!!! The letter goes on to state that Barry (Toad name Bartelomush) had driven past the land for the last 20 years and had said "something needs to be done with that land". He'd had the foresight to drive past for 20 years and comment to his passenger "something needs to be done with that land" but nothing ever happened and now it's too late because 'Chinese interests' would be using it to control regional television and be putting chili in all our foods! Doomed. We are.