Monday, March 30, 2009


I swam so hard at the pool today that when I got out my legs felt like jelly, all wobbly like fat woman's unsupported breasts in a comfy T-shirt she wears every office Christmas party. That, broseph, is eh zackery how I felt. All free and clammy simultaneously. I then skulled some water and felt like I was going to chuck. Like Ben Cousins after he's shown football how it's meant to be played. Kickity kick kick kick marker mark mark.

Upson, who was the toughest kid in all of primary school, told me that he'd love to be a woman so he could 'ride a horse all day with a dildo on the saddle'. Looking back this was a rather odd thing to say. I did not question his comment. I merely laughed as he had said 'dildo' which was, as a year seven, close to the pinnacle of funniest things ever in the whole world.

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